I miss you
by hellmalik
Summary: Draco cant let go of Harry, not even after Harry was killed.


_This beautiful song was written by Jamestown Story. __You should really check them/him out : ) ! _

_+ The world and the characters belong to J.K. Rowling. The song belongs to Jamestown Story. The only thing I own is the idea for this story._

_This is my first drarry fanfiction. I really like these stories, but they are difficult to write, I think, so please be kind to me : )) _

_I hope you will enjoy it and please, please leave me a comment and tell me what you think : ) ! _

_If you what you, you could check out the other stories I have written? : )) _

**I miss you**

_Yesterday was full of tears, __knowing death has just been here_

Even though I am awake, I do not open my eyes. I know you are not by my side, so why would I want to wake up? It would help if I knew you were in this world somewhere, but you're not. You're gone and I don't know how I am going to live with this pain, I might as well lie down beside you and die. There is nothing more in this world for me, there is nothing left without you…

_All was lost but not forgot, the pain controls my every thought _

When I decide that I can't stay in bed all day, I get up. Mother will soon come into my room and she is going to look at me like everything is fine. The fight is over, 'we' have won. The world is like hell, screaming everywhere, pain everywhere but no one feel the need to scream as loud as me, and no one feel a pain as terrible as me. But I am not giving in; no one knows what we had. Not a single person will ever know…

That is why Mother keeps smiling at me, I should be happy. It's your fault the world is ours. But I don't want the world, I want you…

As I start putting on my clothes the pain gets too much, I can't keep pretending like everything is fine, my personal world is a mess, there is war everywhere and the pain is winning. I fall down on the floor and feel the coldness of the floor on my cheek before I faint.

_A new day's battle has just begun, all was lost and nothing's won_

Even when the cold water hits my face I keep my eyes closed. Of course I move a bit, so I don't look all dead to them. I hear my Mother sigh and then the sound of knees hitting the floor. A second later I feel her hands on my face.

"What's wrong Draco?" I felt her starring at me, but I didn't turn around. I kept looking out the window, seeing nothing but green eyes. To be real; I saw nothing, because the green eyes weren't there anymore.

My Mother kept asking me all these questions, but I refused to answer any of them, she would never understand me, and she would think that I had gone mad if I told her, but I have not gone mad! Losing the love of your life make you like this, I am a mess….

_I can't wait to see the day when all these tears all go away_

"Why do you keep looking so sad Draco? Everything will be okay now…" I keep on looking out the window, seeing nothing. All I can think of is you, how I could have jumped out in front of you if my Mother hadn't grabbed my arm the second you threw your cloak on the ground. I could have saved you…

And now I have to stay in this world, alone and with this feeling of guilt inside of me.

I wish it would end right away. I wish I would just fall down, dead and there would be nothing in the world that could help me, just like nothing could help you…

_**I miss you…**_

_I kissed you when they laid you in your grave_

As I walk through the forest a plan starts forming in my head… Soon we will be together again.

When I reach the graveyard the air gets colder, but I know why. It is because of all the spells _they _have put around your grave. Everyone that visits your grave loved you, if they didn't love you, they can't get near you now. But I loved you, and I still love you…

I kneel down on the ground next to your tombstone and the tears starts blurring my eyes. But I don't need to cry anymore, tomorrow we will be together again, there is no need for crying. One more day and then everything will be alright.

"I'll be seeing you soon darling" I whisper as I bend down and kiss your name on the tombstone.

_I need you, to believe you, things were meant to be this way_

I realise that this is one of the quite days. I can't hear screams and everything is quite, it is like the world is taking a break. It was like the world was taking a break the day you died too… 

I overheard one of the meetings in our house one night and it scared me so much that I stayed in my room if I wasn't invited to the meetings.

I never got out of my room if they were having their so called meetings, it didn't matter weather I needed to go to the bathroom or I was starving, I stayed in my room.

"It is meant to be this way my Lord" The voice belonged to a Death Eater I didn't know. He barely whispered and his English was bad. I pushed my ear against the door; I wanted to know more…

"And where have you heard that?" You-Know-Who talked to the Death Eater like he was a child, like he was… me.

"I have my contacts" I heard him say and the way he said it, reminded me of how I used to talk to you… I looked through the keyhole and I was blinded by a green light, I stumbled to the bathroom and started vomit into the sink.

That was the first time I saw someone get killed.

_Today came with shattered dreams; everything is not what it seems_

"Where have you been?" My Mother looked at me like I was something disgusting; I knew she loved me, but right now I was a pain in the ass. I knew she hated when I left our house without saying anything and after some hours I showed up again, with red eyes and a sad smile.

She always believed my stories; that I had been out, just to take a walk and then I ran into some mudbloods and we got fighting… I can't believe that she believed me every single time I told her that story, it wasn't possible to run into a mudblood everytime I went for a walk. And of course I wouldn't kill them, even if I told my Mother so… I couldn't kill them; in some odd way, I am reminded of you when I look at them.

_Don't think that death won't come and get you__ because it will, life is misconstrued_

My Father looked suspicious when I kissed my Mother goodnight after dinner. I still had the sad look on my face when I walked up the stairs; I could feel it.

I sat down on my bed and glanced around in my room. This was the last night I would spend in here, and the thought didn't even make me sad. Tomorrow I would be in a better place…

_Though my battle has just begun, I'm dropping arms and I am going to run_

My hands shake when I pulled out the small box from under my bed. I know what's in it and know what it will do to me, it will help me. I know it will because I had made it myself. Snape checked it and if was perfect, of course. It will take me to you and then we can be together forever…

I touch the box lightly with my fingertips, it is cold. I know that this is going to be one of the last things I am going to do, but I don't care. I am actually happy about it.

I try to unlock the box but my fingers shake too much, the battle between my fingers and my brain has begun, my brain and my heart…

_I can't wait to see the day when all these painful tears all go away_

I take a deep breath to calm myself and I think of you. The way your eyes brightened up when I said your name, the way your teeth showed when you smiled, the way your lips felt against mine in the rain, the way you looked at me when you knew I wasn't alright, the way you…

Finally I get the box opened and I take the small bottle out… I put it down on bed and let my pillow hide it, I don't wanna look at it right now, and then I take a final look at the letter I have written to my Mother.

I look at my own handwriting and realise that my words only will make my Mother hate me. She doesn't want to know about us… She would freak out if she found out. So I take the letter and tear it into pieces. I put them in the box and place the box on my table.

Even a small move like that, putting the box on my table, makes my heart ache. But it will soon be over.

_I did nothing at all, nothing at all; it's all my fault that you are gone_

It was like the green light lit up the entire forest, it lit up my entire mind. I couldn't see anything, not even you, but I heard you fall. And when the green light stopped brightening up my mind, I saw you, on your knees and with dead eyes.

I watched the rest of your body hit the ground and my world stood still. I couldn't feel a thing, I remember thinking that this wasn't reality, it was a dream… I almost expected you to stand up and kill Him.

But when you kept lying on the ground I felt my heart break. Literally, my heart broke, it shattered.

I wanted to touch you, to comfort you, your body, even though your soul wasn't there anymore, but at the same time I just wanted to get away… away from my living nightmare.

My need to touch you and comfort you, was bigger than my need to get away. I took a step towards you, but then I felt something pull me back. I looked to my right and saw my Mother stand beside me, keeping her hand around my arm…

I turned my head around and looked at you, just looked at you and felt a need, so strong it almost crushed me, to lie beside you and take you in my arms.

I open my eyes and realise I am still in my room. The picture of you lying on the ground, with lifeless eyes, has hunted me ever since. And that is why I have to take the potion I have made… I don't want to see the picture ever again, I want to see the real you, the living you…

_Your face on my wall, it tells it all, you will live on_

I open the bottle and fix my eyes on the liquid inside of it. I place my lips on the outside of the bottle and whisper to it, begging it to take me away from this place.

I stare around in my room for the last time. All this would soon be gone, I will be gone…

I pull my legs into the bed and stare at the wall. I can't make myself look at the liquid in the bottle.

As I put the bottle to my mouth I still stare at the wall. But the wall isn't a wall anymore; you are standing right in front of my bed. You hold your hand out towards me and I take it. I don't care where you are leading me, as long as I am with you everything is gonna be alright.

_~ by kirababykaos i: _


End file.
